Bright Side Of The Road Closed Until Further Notice

The bright side of the road has been closed until further notice, the Bureau of Plausible Deniability announced today, despite repeated protests from Van Morrison. A spokesman said too many people were crossing from the dark side to the bright side at exactly the same point on the road and blamed the Belfast singer for creating a situation that was likely to lead to an unacceptable risk of death or injury to pedestrians.

The little known, secretive bureau which is commonly described as ‘a political mudflap, designed to protect the government from any political blowback, caused by badly thought out policies’, later issued a clarification, blaming the closure on, “Covid, the war in Ukraine, the price of oil, inflation and the Chinese spy balloon.” However, it added, it will still be legal to look on the bright side of the road until after the next budget.