“Must You Ruin Everything?” Man Asks Wife Who Just Saved Him From Accidentally Electrocuting Himself
Hopelessly inept DIY fanatic Gerry Adams whose wife privately refers to him as a ‘Destroy It Yourself’ fanatic, was saved from accidentally killing himself earlier today. “Must you ruin everything?” he whined, just after she prevented him from flipping the trip switch on the fuse box of their suburban semi-d.
“Alright, alright,” he complained, as she explained that if she hadn’t intervened, she’d never have been able to get the smell out of the kitchen. “Do you ever think of anyone but yourself!” she said in a manner best described as ‘more in sorrow than surprise’.
“Oh is it time for the ‘list of disasters you’ve saved me from’ speech?” he inquired, coldly. “The time I was too drunk to drive and you made me switch places just before we came to the police checkpoint? The time you stopped me from accidentally burning the house down? The time I took too many laxative tablets but still wanted to go to the swimming pool? You’re never happy until you’ve ruined everything!”