Nation Fully Backs Hysterical Response To Weather Forecast
“Well I’m sorry, I must be old fashioned,” volcanic tempered mother-of-three Eileen Maher snapped after reading an Irish weather forecast than contained a colour-coded ‘Status Orange’ snow warning.
“But snow had only one colour when I was growing up!”
45 year old Mrs Maher felt ‘she spoke for the country’ when she said she thought the lurid coverage was being orchestrated by ‘shadowy forces bent on undermining the church’.
Meanwhile, polls showed the nation fully backs the media’s hysterical response to a weather warning that there may be ‘up to 3cms of snow in some areas’. Two thirds of those asked, said they were planning to go home early and take tomorrow off too. Roughly three quarters said they would “make a night in of it” by ordering in a curry from their local Asian restaurant.
When asked why they would choose an Indian meal, the most common response was “Because a) they do great food and b) they’d stay open in a blizzard”.